The 5 NBA Teams I Hate the Most

In honor of the Phoenix Suns' glorious sweep of the Spurs, I thought I would share my thoughts about the 5 NBA teams that I love to hate the most. I am interested in your thoughts on my hatred. These go in order from least to most hated:

5. The Dallas Mavericks - I have nothing against Dallas or Maverick players - I actually really like J Kidd, Nowitzki and even Jason Terry. The only reason I hate the Mavericks is because of Mark Cuban. I can't stand the man - the sight of him makes my hair stand on end. I loved watching the Spurs beat the Mavericks for the simple fact that watching Mark Cuban lose makes me happy.

4. The Denver Nuggets - or should I say Thuggets. There is no bigger group of thugs on an NBA court anywhere in the league. Kenyon Martin is a class A thug with very few basketball skills at all. Chris Andersen, although he plays very hard, is a giant tattoo-ridden thug. JR Smith - I don't even have the words for how big a thug that guy is. Nene, thug. Carmelo? Debatable. The only player on their roster that I actually like is Chauncey Billups. I hate the Thuggets and I am glad they are out.

3. The Los Angeles Lakers - some would think that my hatred for the Lakers would top any other team in the league. Even though there are two other teams that I hate more, I despise the Lakers. I dislike them a lot less than I used to and I really don't think Kobe is as bad as Osama bin Laden. I hate Kobe less now than I used to, but I still dislike him strongly. I can't stand Artest for obvious reasons. Other than that, I don't really dislike any of their players. I think the reason I dislike the Lakers so much is because they win so much. I know that's not a good reason to dislike them, but that's my reason. And I guess that's why I don't dislike them nearly as much as I used to. I would love to see them in the Western Conference Finals.

These last two are a toss-up - I hate them both equally. It really depends on the day of the week.

2. Utah Jazzercizers - I have been to many NBA games and I have never been to one where the fans are so lame and mouthy and foul and mean spirited as to when I went to a Suns game in Salt Lake City. Now, I don't know what it is about LDS people and basketball - but we are such bad sports. I know that's an awful thing to say, but it is true. I reffed BYU intramural basketball for several years and I have never seen such poor sportsmanship. Not to say that the entire Jazz arena is filled with Mormons, but it has to be the prevailing majority. I also think that Jerry Sloan (although he gets more out of less than any coach I know of) coaches his players to play dirty, although less now than back in the day of Stockton and Malone. The only time I am a Laker fan ever, is when they play the Jazz. I absolutely love watching the Jazz lose.

1. San Antonio Spurs - was there really any doubt who would be on top of this list? Where do I even begin to describe my hatred for the Spurs? Bruce Bowen - dirty player. Robert Horry - dirty player. Manu Ginobili - biggest flopper (and nose) in league history. Gregg Popazit - the only coach I hate more than the Zen Master. Tony Parker - is he really good looking enough to have landed Eva Longoria? I think not. Tim Duncan - crybaby and reminds me of Cedric the Entertainer (rest his soul) when a foul is called on him with the bulging eyes looking with disbelief. That stupid coyote that passes as a mascot - lame. I categorically HATE the Spurs. Not because they win a lot, and they do. Not because they beat the Suns a lot, and they do. I just hate them. Nothing was more satisfying than to watch the Spurs not only lose, but lose catastrophically in spectacular fashion. You would think that beating them would lessen my hatred for the Spurs, and you would be wrong.